Today’s been a difficult day. I’ve currently been sitting on the same couch for seven hours trying to write something for today’s post. This series has wiped me out way more than I ever expected it to. I feel like a sponge thats been fully squeezed out. I have nothing more to give. It’s hard for me to even determine what is good and what is not, what is worth being shared and what is not.
So instead, today, I’ve thrown in the towel and accepted that I cannot create anything new.
But I don’t want to give up entirely. I do want to share SOMETHING. I want to at least pretend I can complete this personal goal of a post a day. So today I am going to share four things little notes, dare I call them poems, from a few months ago. All were written in transit back to Central California after trip to Uganda.
I had to be back in the closet while in Uganda. (A crappy time for my soul.) Clearly not being in the closet anymore made my heart sing like a bird because every cute boy I encountered turned into a love poem. Oops.
April 2, 2019 - Boarding
Hello beautiful human who I spotted walking down the airplane aisle.
Whose canter made my fingers cross.
You sat two aisles too soon.
We would have been great together.
April 2, 2019 - To the Flight Attendant
I wonder if he knows the light he carries
the joy he brings to every room
the way the jokes
and make his coworker’s work workable
How does your mother treat you?
What friends left you when you finally told them who you were?
April 2, 2019 - Headed West
Chasing sunset at 30,000 feet
knowing the darkness will win
but only after the longest golden hour I’ve ever experienced.
Maybe that’s what my first love will be like.
April 8, 2019 - Grapevine Crush
Goodbye cute boy
driving alone in the Chevy volt
with a New York plates
who I passed and I looked
and am glad I did.
Are you on a road trip like I was?
I thought I’d never see you again.
Slowing down for you to pass me didn’t work
in this magical world
the stardust brought you to pee
in the urinal next to mine.
You didn’t notice me.
You didn’t know that I noticed you.
I like the way you use your elbow to dispense soap,
the way you float around the gas station looking for the right chips,
or the right drink,
or the right whatever that thing is to keep you on the road.
Goodbye sweet boy.
You will be missed.